When you’re a young athlete, navigating your way through tough conversations with your coach can feel like you’re entering a battlefield, armed with only your words. The pressure to perform, the anxiety about being misunderstood, and the fear of confrontation often prevent athletes from advocating for themselves. But here’s the thing: advocating for yourself is a crucial skill, especially if you’re neurodivergent. It’s about ensuring that your unique needs are understood and supported, allowing you to thrive both on and off the field.

For neurodivergent athletes, this becomes even more important. Whether it’s ADHD, autism, or any other condition on the spectrum, the way we communicate and process information might differ from the norm. And that’s okay; it’s simply a matter of finding the right words to bridge the gap between you and your coach.

Why Self-Advocacy Matters

Imagine you’re an athlete who struggles with anxiety or sensory sensitivities. The sound of a whistle might send you into a panic, or maybe the noise from the crowd feels overwhelming during a match. If you don’t have the tools to communicate that to your coach, the result could be a mental block or a performance issue that doesn’t reflect your true abilities. This is where self-advocacy comes in. When you can speak up about your challenges, you help your coach understand what’s going on and how they can best support you.

Advocating for yourself also builds trust. When a coach knows they can rely on you to communicate openly, they’ll be better equipped to help you improve. It’s a win-win: you get the support you need, and your coach gains insight into how to work with you as an individual.

Breaking Down the Conversation: What You Need to Know

Tough conversations don’t have to be overwhelming. Here are a few steps that can help you approach these moments with confidence:

1. Know What You Need
   Before approaching your coach, take some time to reflect on your needs. What specific challenges are you facing? Are you feeling overwhelmed by the pace of practice? Do you need extra time to process feedback? Understanding your needs will make it easier to express them clearly.

2. Choose the Right Time
   Timing matters. Avoid trying to have a difficult conversation in the heat of the moment, right after a game, or during a stressful practice. Instead, find a calm time when both you and your coach can focus on the conversation. Perhaps after practice or even in a scheduled meeting.

3. Use “I” Statements
   Framing your feelings with “I” statements takes the pressure off the conversation and makes it less likely to come across as accusatory. For example, “I feel overwhelmed when there’s a lot of noise around me during games” is less confrontational than, “The noise during games makes it hard for me to focus.”

4. Be Honest, But Be Open to Feedback
   Honesty is key, but so is being open to feedback. Your coach may not fully understand what you’re going through at first, and that’s okay. Be patient, and allow the conversation to evolve into a discussion about how both of you can make adjustments to improve the situation.

5. Set Clear Expectations
   Sometimes, the conversation will result in a plan of action. Set clear expectations for yourself and your coach. If you need extra time to process instructions, ask for that. If you’re working on a mental performance skill like focus or resilience, outline how you can practice that both in and out of practice.

The Role of Coaches: Creating Space for Understanding

Coaches, it’s important to recognize that every athlete is different. One-size-fits-all approaches don’t work for everyone. Being attuned to the needs of neurodivergent athletes can drastically improve both performance and overall well-being. And that begins with creating a safe, open environment where tough conversations are welcomed.

If you’re a coach working with neurodivergent athletes, take the time to learn about their unique needs. Ask questions, encourage communication, and make adjustments where necessary. Sometimes, it might be a matter of offering a little extra time, changing the environment, or offering more direct, clear instructions.

Moving Forward

Tough conversations are never easy, but they are essential for creating an environment where athletes feel heard, supported, and empowered. By advocating for your needs, you help shape a more understanding and effective relationship with your coach, one that fosters growth both on and off the field. For neurodivergent athletes, especially, these conversations are an opportunity to create the space you need to thrive.

If you’re looking to build mental performance skills, whether it’s gaining more focus, boosting confidence, or developing resilience, there are opportunities to dive deeper into these topics. One such opportunity is the Mental Performance Boot Camp this July, where athletes will gain practical strategies that can be applied to both sports and daily life.  Feel free to check all my upcoming events.

The goal here is to keep the conversation going, whether it’s with your coach, your parents, or with yourself. It’s all part of building a better mental game, because who said navigating tough conversations can’t be your secret weapon? Each conversation you have is an opportunity to grow stronger, more confident, and more self-aware. When you express your needs and challenges, you take control of your mental game. Over time, these conversations become less intimidating and more empowering, allowing you to unlock new levels of performance and self-discovery.

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As coaches, we pride ourselves on being able to read our athletes. We see when they’re tired, when they’re frustrated, when they need encouragement, and when they need a good old-fashioned push. But for neurodivergent athletes, some of their biggest struggles aren’t as visible. And that’s where we, as coaches, might be missing the mark.

Neurodivergence isn’t just a trendy buzzword—it’s a reality for many young athletes. It encompasses a range of conditions like ADHD, autism, dyslexia, dyspraxia, and more. The problem? These athletes often face obstacles that aren’t immediately obvious to the untrained eye, which means their struggles can be mistaken for laziness, defiance, or lack of effort. That’s not just frustrating for the athlete; it’s an absolute coaching failure.

Let’s talk about some of the hidden struggles neurodivergent athletes face and what we, as coaches, can do about it.

The Overload You Don’t See

A neurodivergent athlete might look fine on the surface but could be battling sensory overload. The bright gym lights, the constant whistle-blowing, the feeling of a scratchy uniform—it can all pile up and lead to shutdown or meltdown. And guess what? Most kids won’t tell you that’s the problem. Instead, they might disengage, act out, or completely check out.

Coach’s Move: Learn the triggers. If an athlete seems “off,” don’t assume attitude—ask questions. Small changes, like offering sunglasses for bright lights or noise-canceling headphones during chaotic moments, can make a world of difference.

The Processing Gap

Ever feel like you give clear instructions, but an athlete just isn’t following through? It’s easy to chalk that up to a lack of focus, but for some neurodivergent athletes, it’s a processing issue. They might need more time to absorb information, or they might need instructions broken down into smaller steps.

Coach’s Move: Give instructions in multiple ways—verbal, visual, and, when possible, physical demonstration. And most importantly, give them time. If you’re rapid-firing commands and getting frustrated that they’re not sinking in, that’s on you, not them.

The Social Struggle

Team sports are a social jungle, and for neurodivergent athletes, navigating that can be exhausting. Reading social cues, understanding unspoken rules, or even handling casual banter can be a challenge. And if they misread a situation? They might shut down or lash out, making them an easy target for teammates who don’t understand what’s really going on.

Coach’s Move: Foster a culture of inclusion. Take time to educate your team about different communication styles. Encourage direct and clear communication between players rather than relying on unspoken expectations. And for the love of all things sports, shut down bullying and exclusion immediately.

The “Lazy” Label That’s Anything But

One of the biggest mistakes a coach can make is assuming a neurodivergent athlete isn’t trying just because they seem disengaged. Some neurodivergent athletes struggle with executive function, meaning tasks like organizing, planning, and initiating action can feel nearly impossible. It’s not that they don’t want to do it—it’s that their brain isn’t making it easy.

Coach’s Move: Instead of labeling an athlete as unmotivated, find out what’s getting in the way. Provide structured routines, clear expectations, and gentle prompts to help them get started. And recognize that their best effort might not always look the way you expect it to.

The Emotional Rollercoaster

Neurodivergent athletes often experience emotions in a more intense way than their neurotypical peers. What seems like a minor setback can feel like the end of the world. If a coach doesn’t understand this, they might dismiss an athlete’s reaction as “dramatic” or “over-the-top.”

Coach’s Move: Validate emotions. Instead of saying, “Calm down” or “It’s not a big deal,” acknowledge their feelings: “I see that you’re really frustrated—let’s take a breath and figure this out.” Teach emotional regulation strategies just as you would teach a skill drill.

The Burnout That Sneaks Up

Many neurodivergent athletes are masters of masking—that is, pretending to be fine while internally struggling. They push themselves to fit in, to keep up, to meet expectations that weren’t designed with them in mind. And then, seemingly out of nowhere, they burn out. They stop showing up. They lose interest. And coaches are left scratching their heads, wondering what happened.

Coach’s Move: Pay attention to early signs of burnout—decreased engagement, increased frustration, avoidance. Build in rest periods and check-ins. Ask how they’re feeling about practice, competition, and their role on the team. And most importantly, let them know that they don’t have to perform at 100% every single day to be valued.

Wrapping It Up

The best coaches don’t just coach the sport—they coach the individual. Neurodivergent athletes bring incredible strengths to their teams, but their struggles are often misunderstood or overlooked. By taking the time to understand and accommodate these hidden challenges, we’re not just helping them succeed in sport—we’re setting them up for success in life.

So, the next time you catch yourself frustrated with an athlete who isn’t “getting it” or who seems disengaged, take a step back and ask yourself: What might I be missing? Because great coaching isn’t about making every athlete fit into one mold—it’s about meeting them where they are and helping them grow from there.

The post The Hidden Struggles of Neurodivergent Athletes appeared first on Dan Mickle.

Psychological safety gets tossed around a lot in coaching circles these days, but let’s be honest—most of the time, it’s treated like an afterthought. Sure, every coach wants their athletes to feel comfortable and supported, but when it comes to neurodivergent athletes, “feeling safe” takes on a whole different meaning.

Psychological safety is the belief that one can take risks, make mistakes, and be their authentic self without fear of punishment, embarrassment, or exclusion. For neurodivergent athletes—those with ADHD, autism, dyslexia, sensory processing differences, or other neurological variations—this safety is not just about avoiding the harsh coach who yells a little too much. It’s about knowing they won’t be judged for stimming, needing extra processing time, or struggling with certain social cues.

The Standard Approach Falls Short

Most psychological safety advice for teams focuses on communication, trust, and reducing fear of failure. And while that’s important, it often assumes a level playing field when it comes to how athletes process information, emotions, and social interactions. Neurodivergent athletes often experience the world differently, and a “one-size-fits-all” approach can actually increase their stress rather than alleviate it.

Let’s take the classic “open-door policy” that many coaches promote. “Hey, if you have a problem, just come talk to me!” sounds great in theory, but for an autistic athlete who struggles with initiating conversation or reading social cues, that’s not a safety net—it’s a roadblock. Or how about the “We’re all about accountability here” speech? For an athlete with ADHD who genuinely forgot the team rule because their working memory functions differently, being “held accountable” can feel like a personal attack rather than a learning opportunity.

Building Psychological Safety for Neurodivergent Athletes

So, how do we actually create an environment where neurodivergent athletes feel safe, included, and empowered? It takes more than good intentions. Here’s what actually works:

Predictability is Key

Uncertainty is a major stressor for many neurodivergent athletes. Having consistent routines, clear expectations, and structured practices can go a long way in reducing anxiety. If a schedule changes, communicate it as early as possible.

Clarity Over Assumptions

Neurodivergent athletes often struggle with implied rules or unspoken expectations. Instead of saying “hustle more,” say “I need you to sprint to the baseline in under five seconds.” The more concrete, the better.

Failure as a Learning Tool, Not a Punishment

Many neurodivergent athletes are perfectionists—not because they want to be the best, but because they’ve been corrected so often in their lives that failure feels catastrophic. Coaches must be intentional in framing mistakes as part of growth rather than as something to “fix.”

Alternative Communication Options

Some athletes struggle with verbal processing but thrive with written instructions or visuals. Others may need time to process before responding to feedback. Being flexible with communication styles ensures they’re actually receiving and understanding what you’re saying.

Sensory Considerations Matter

Loud whistles, bright lights, itchy uniforms—these can be minor inconveniences for most but overwhelming obstacles for some neurodivergent athletes. Creating an environment where they can advocate for their needs without judgment is essential.

Model Emotional Regulation

Neurodivergent athletes often struggle with emotional regulation, so seeing a coach handle pressure calmly and effectively teaches them more than any lecture ever could. If a coach is quick to frustration, guess what? That anxiety spreads to the team.

Encourage Self-Advocacy, But Don’t Expect It Immediately

Many neurodivergent individuals have been conditioned to suppress their needs to fit in. Creating a safe space where they can gradually express their needs without fear of consequences is crucial. Celebrate when they do speak up!

The Long-Term Impact

When neurodivergent athletes feel psychologically safe, their engagement, confidence, and long-term participation in sports increase. They’re more willing to take risks, problem-solve, and embrace their unique strengths rather than hide them.

At the end of the day, psychological safety isn’t just a coaching philosophy—it’s a commitment to meeting athletes where they are, not where we assume they should be. And when we get it right, we’re not just making better athletes—we’re making sports better for everyone.

So, next time you think about psychological safety, don’t just check a box. Build an environment where neurodivergent athletes feel like they belong—because that’s when real growth happens.

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Coaching is communication. But what happens when words aren’t enough?

For many neurodivergent athletes—whether they’re autistic, have ADHD, dyslexia, or other cognitive processing differences—traditional verbal instruction can feel like a jumble of sounds that don’t quite click. You tell them to “stay in their lane,” and they take it literally. You shout “keep your head in the game,” and suddenly, they’re overanalyzing the philosophical implications of their existence on the field. The good news? There are better ways to communicate that can make coaching more effective and, frankly, less frustrating for everyone involved.

The Problem with Traditional Coaching Communication

Most coaches default to verbal instructions because, well, that’s how they were taught. But just because a method has always been used doesn’t mean it’s the best. Many neurodivergent athletes process information differently: they might struggle with auditory processing, have difficulty filtering out background noise, or require extra time to process spoken words. And let’s be real—”just listen better” is not an effective coaching strategy.

So, what’s the fix? The key is shifting from a one-size-fits-all verbal approach to a multi-modal communication style that integrates visual, kinesthetic, and alternative cues.

Show, Don’t Just Tell

If words aren’t sticking, demonstrate. Neurodivergent athletes often thrive with visual modeling—seeing the movement rather than just hearing about it.

Use Video Clips: Show a quick video of the skill in action. Bonus points if you can slow it down or annotate key movements.
Demonstrate It Yourself: Nothing says “this is how it’s done” like doing it yourself.
Peer Modeling: Have another athlete demonstrate the correct form or strategy in real-time.

Visual Cues and Supports

A picture really is worth a thousand words, especially for athletes who process visual information more effectively than auditory instructions.

Diagrams and Playbooks: Use simple drawings, diagrams, or whiteboard sketches to break down plays and movements.
Hand Signals: Create specific, consistent hand signals for key instructions like “slow down,” “move left,” or “reset.”
Color Coding: Use cones, markers, or colored wristbands to visually distinguish roles or zones on the field.
Cue Cards: Simple, laminated cards with reminders like “Eyes Up” or “Follow Through” can serve as subtle, effective coaching tools.

Kinesthetic and Alternative Cues

Some athletes learn best by feeling rather than seeing or hearing. In other words, let them experience the movement firsthand.

Guided Movement: Lightly tap their shoulder to indicate where they should turn, or guide their foot placement for balance.
Resistance Training: Using bands or light resistance can help athletes feel the proper motion of a skill.
Rhythmic Coaching: Clap, stomp, or use a metronome to help with pacing and movement timing. (Think of it like choreographing a sport—yes, even football has rhythm!)

Reducing Verbal Overload

When you do use words, be strategic. Neurodivergent athletes often benefit from concise, concrete language and extra processing time.

Shorten Your Instructions: Instead of “Make sure you square your shoulders, keep your hips low, and drive through your legs,” try “Low hips. Drive forward.”
One-Step Directions: Break instructions into single steps rather than giving a full sequence at once.
Give Processing Time: Count to five silently after giving an instruction before repeating or clarifying.
Check for Understanding: Instead of “Do you get it?” ask, “Can you show me what that looks like?”

Creating a Low-Stress Communication Environment

Sometimes, it’s not just what you say but how you say it that matters.

Stay Predictable: Routine and structure help neurodivergent athletes feel secure in their learning environment.
Use Positive Reinforcement: Acknowledge efforts with specific feedback—“Great job keeping your feet wide!” rather than a generic “Good work.”
Minimize Background Noise: If possible, reduce distractions by controlling the environment where instructions are given.
Nonverbal Check-Ins: Give athletes a way to communicate their understanding or comfort level, such as a thumbs-up/thumbs-down system.

Coaching Success Story: Making It Click

I once worked with a young volleyball player on the autism spectrum who struggled with positioning during games. No matter how many times his coach yelled, “Stay wide!” he would drift toward the center of the court. We introduced visual boundary markers—a brightly colored cone at the edge of his range—and suddenly, everything clicked. He saw where he needed to be, and the verbal instruction that once felt meaningless now had context. No frustration, no confusion—just a simple adaptation that made all the difference.

Final Thoughts: A Coach’s Job is to Adapt

If there’s one takeaway here, it’s this: Coaches should adapt to their athletes, not the other way around. When you expand beyond verbal instruction and embrace alternative communication styles, you’re not just making your job easier—you’re making learning more accessible, engaging, and effective for every athlete on your team.

Because at the end of the day, coaching isn’t about saying the most words. It’s about making sure the right message gets through.

That’s it for today! Remember: OneDayOne. It is either Day One or One Day. Always your choice. And of course… #DontSuck

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